The wisdom of Robbie pt. 6...

His last things.

That's their house in the background on the left.

Dude, could this get any more painful?

I'm sure he's smiling at this but, nonetheless, I'm the one sitting here with pain in my gut having to write this.

Please note how few bins there are.

Robbie didn't leave much behind.

This is a good and righteous act. This is consistent with his worldview and with the Gospel that, in addition to Kate and the kids, was the center of his life.

"Travel lightly..."

You can't take any of the things you accumulate 'with' you when it's your turn to go. You've heard this before, now you see evidence of it and, the reason for this post, is you KNOW that the dude who's 'last things' those are, was someone 'real', someone you 'actually' knew who did what he said, lived what he believed, who meant every admonition he ever gave you.

So, listen to Robbie, and do what he did.

Travel lightly.

You have a new year ahead of you. Decide *now* what you can jettison this year and what you're going to devote yourself to. There was no way Robbie knew last New Years would be his last here on the Earth, who's to say it's going to go down any differently for you?

Morbid? Nope. Honest? Yup. Challenging? You betcha'.

Starting with me baby. Starting with me.

T

The Wisdom of Robbie pt. 5...

I've started this post three or four times. Each time I've deleted it due to the fact that it was far too negative to be made public.

Figured I'd try one last time.

It's as if he's staring at me telling me what I'm reading above.

"It's about GOD stupid!"

It's very clear to those of us who lived with him that he believed this to his core. Man, I've been finding it hard to believe for myself lately. And here we come to the crux, perhaps, of this whole deal.

Robbie's dying has made me doubt God's goodness, His wisdom, His very existence.

There, I said it.

And you're thinking "Great, this guy's a pastor, hope his church doesn't know..."

Pretty sure they do.

Pretty sure an honest pastor is better (MUCH better) than one who pretends.

See, it's Christmas time and the pain of Robbie's absence is almost more than we can bear. In fact, it IS more than we can bear, but since we don't just spontaneously drop dead from the grief, we just keep wandering through our lives wondering if this has really happened to us.

(how is this possible?)

We had 'early christmas dinner' yesterday with Mom and Dad and Kate and her kids and ours. No Robbie. Very hard.

I've always tried to tell the truth on this here blog in the hopes that it might be of some encouragement to you on your journey so I won't lie to you. I won't tell you it's all good and that we're a happy go lucky bunch right now.

But I will tell you that we're in some deep, I mean the deepest, deeper than deep, pain over here and, yet, in the midst of it we hear his voice in our head telling us...

"It's about GOD stupid!"

So I don't think any of us will be quitting anytime soon but, boy, this sure 'aint fun.

Love you man.

T