Eight items or less...

I was supposed to be getting a bottle of wine...

It turned into a roast chicken, sushi, eggs, cheese, creamed honey, three cans of peaches, and shredded wheat.

That's nine.

Nine items.

And the 'express lane' at our grocery store is eight items or less.  

Now seeing as it was twenty minutes to closing time and the place was deadsville I figured I'd ask and see.  So I walked up to the express checkout girl and asked her if she was going to count the cans of peaches as one item or as three.  She looked embarrassed, blushed a little, then told me the 'scanner' (let's pass the buck, shall we?) would count 'em as three.

So I smiled, thanked her, turned my cart around and walked over to the less busy of the two remaining checkouts.  

(and each of them was quite busy 'cause the store was conserving staff and shutting things down therefore had only two lanes left open...)

As I walked away I could hear snickering.  People were laughing at me 'cause I turned away from the express lane even though I was only ONE item over.

I walked past the first remaining checkout and it looked pretty busy.  I got to the second remaining and it was even more so.  So I turned around again and returned to the first remaining checkout.

(all of this for a few groceries...)

I took my place in line, unloaded my NINE items, and noticed that the ladies in front of me were smiling at me a bit.  I didn't think much of it.  Sometimes women smile.  Then as they turned to leave, their groceries all packed, the one lady looked me in the eye.

"How many items did you have?" she asked, grinning.  "Well, I had nine."  "Thought so!" and she started laughing, good natured, and her friend with her.  Catching on, I looked at them and smiled in turn.  "Well, you know, it's a pet peeve of mine, people who go through the express lane with ten, thirteen items.  It's like they're telling the rest of us we count for less than nothing.  I just couldn't stand being one of those jerks."

(so self-righteous...)

"Yeah we figured..." said they.  And I took my opening for one last stab for the sake of the light in the dark.  

"Yeah well, you know what they say about righteousness?  It's what you do when no one else is looking..."

They laughed, good natured, and smiled at that too.

And as they walked off I had one of those quietly thankful moments.  Thankful that, for once, I did the right thing.  I didn't act like a numbskull.  I wasn't a jerk.  I did the right thing, just because it was the right thing.

(and Lord knows, that can be a rare thing in the midst of my busy days...)

And that got me thinking about you people and the moments you'll have this week where you can do the right thing--even when/if it inconveniences you.

And then I got to thinking about preachers and storytellers and I realized that you can't fake the good stuff.  Good writers, electric preachers, do it right because something's 'right' inside of them.  I don't mean they're 'all' right--because none of us are--just that sometimes they get things the way they're meant to be gotten.

They get it right.

And you can't fake right.

When no one's looking, when no one's around, you have to be able to go to the quiet place and pull blood from a stone.  You have to find the inspiration to inspire.  You have to anticipate how the audience will be reacting to what you're doing to them with your story/sermon structure and the ways in which you're manipulating the content and storyline and you have to design a piece of work that will mean something to them.

Same thing if you're leading a team at work or trying to make your marriage work.

You have to have it 'right' on the inside 'cause if it 'aint, what you show on the outside 'aint going to be neither.

(southern-ism intended...)

Or to put a twist on what Forest's Momma told him.

"Stupid does what stupid is..."

Right?

Right.

From checkout lines, to storylines.

Doing the right thing needs to come natural or, before you know it, you're a propagandist.

T