So that's about what my night's looking like...NFL football in the background, some 'two bite' desserts in the foreground, and a bottle of australian shiraz in the middle of it all.
(no I'm not going to drink the whole bottle tonight)
All I need now is my wife...
Problem is, every time you combine my wife and I with a bottle of vino rosso, you end up with:
Yes, I'm back in Vancouver, getting our new studio set up. That's right, 'our' studio. We've moved out of our digs at Shaw (and lasting love and respect and thanks go out to the ENTIRE team out there...) to a new spot in the heart of Yaletown, the coolest neighborhood in downtown Vancouver.
I'll take some shots of it this week and post 'em for you to see.
There are a couple of things that are interesting about this transition that are, I think, SFS worthy.
First, the whole thing of our 'own' space is a 'trip' in and of itself. For so long (nearly ten years) we've been way on the beggars end of the 'beggars can't be choosers...' spectrum. We've been living and working in borrowed space on what seemed like borrowed time. The very 'permanence' of a space that we've leased is a whole other level that I've often thought about but, now that it's here, feels weird.
Part of that is due to the fact that with the space comes a whole host of new headaches (like re-building it, re-powering it, figuring out how to light it, realizing that our set probably won't fit into it, etc...) and that goes to prove to us all, once again, that you never truly 'arrive'--there is no 'OZ' there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Just another hill to climb.
Granted, said hill is in 'new territory' and that's exiting, but a hill is--after all--still a hill.
Second, whenever you do something for what you think are the right reasons you add heartache to the mix. What's funny is that we've been working this whole studio angle to SAVE money but, I'm guessing that the very nature of our 'own' space has the people I work with suddenly thinking they can jockey for more money. It's as if they psychically think that since we're getting our own space we MUST have more money somewhere we're not telling them about that they're determined to get their hands on.
Seriously, I've been fielding non-stop requests for more cash from my people for the past few weeks. And what gets me down about that (and, some of them read this blog, so it's clearly not a point of 'personal' contention or something that I don't want out in the open) is that I don't have any more to give. And the issue with that is that it's hard to keep people feeling happy and valued when your tangible ability to give them anything actual is severely limited.
The thing for all of us to consider here is that, ultimately, all the people around us see life ONLY from their own perspective. And that's not something that ever changes. Most people (all of us by times) are functioning on the level of 'self-interest' most of the time. Sure, sometimes we do the right thing just for the sake of doing the right thing but, my sense of it (and, granted, my sense is limited...) is that we do the right thing mostly because we think it will help us out.
And it's okay (or maybe not 'okay' but natural...) to feel like we need to help ourselves because life is hard and we feel scared much of the time as we stare the urge to survive right in the face.
But, man, facing all that self-interest (in myself also) gets tiring and can make you very jaded very quickly and jadedness ultimately leads to loneliness because you feel like it's you against everybody else.
And if you let an adversarial attitude creep in you're in trouble.
The only thing I keep thinking of is that I need to try and stay humble and to give others the benefit of the doubt and to trust the process and (full disclosure) the Lord of the process who (I hope) is leading us in the right direction through it all.
The thing that I've learned sixteen years later (yes, I started doing this when I was 18) is that there's no point stressing too much about all the little things you can't control. When it comes to showbiz and the business of building a Church or a life or a career the 'thing' you're working towards will generally happen because is HAS to. If you just keep showing up, keep putting in the hours, keep bringing your talent to bear on the task at hand, keep doing your best in every given situation to do what you know in your heart (and with your mind) is the right thing, you'll generally be okay and the thing you need to have happen will, generally, happen.
It really does come down to hanging around long enough that it just starts happening.
Of course, nobody's going to let you hang around very long if you suck at the thing you're trying to do, but--assuming you're not totally useless--if you can stick it out long enough, you'll generally find yourself advancing as each year goes by. Looking back you'll find that you know more, have experienced more, have suffered and survived more, have met more people who can positively impact your life and from whom you can learn, and generally you'll find yourself better equipped to do that thing that you've been built to do.
So long as you keep at it.
And keep at it.
And keep at it.
T
