It looked like it was going to just be another lovely day at our new church. I drove to our location with my boys in-tow (they're the only 'paid' employees the church has right now at $2/week to help us set up and tear down...). I pulled up to set the first sign at the main intersection leading into our parking area and saw the image above. Beautiful sun lighting the way. Had to take a shot.
Then, I got to work. We removed all the music stands (we use a rehearsal hall as our 'sanctuary') moved all the chairs (84 of 'em at this point) into position then, right before we started with all the sound gear I figured I'd pop downstairs to use the bathroom. As soon as I walked in I could smell it. Someone had been there before me. It smelled so bad that I got that sinking feeling--oh man, somebody dealt it and left it. So, I checked the stalls. Sure enough, one of 'em looked like a Grizzly Bear had snuck in, dumped its load, and bailed out before it could get caught. I mean, it seemed incomprehensible that something of that SIZE could have come out of a human. "Note to self..." I thought, "Check to see who's LIMPING and you'll know who did this."
(what do these people EAT? Can I make a suggestion? 'BRAN FLAKES')
'Cause, seriously, you do something like that and LEAVE IT? What kind of person does that? You KNOW that someone else is going to have to deal with it and you're leaving it for them to do just that. It's so disrespectful it boggles the mind.
(I'm wondering if that Grizzly will read this and be mad at me for calling them out. "Hey Grizzly! I'm mad at YOU for making me deal with YOUR POO!")
'Cause that's what I was going to have to do. I am, after all, 'The Pastor' and we don't have a janitor yet and if I didn't deal with it I was only going to have myself to blame if we had a new person join us at Church this week then leave 'cause, when they hit the john before service, they found GRIZZLY POOP left to rot in the bathroom and got a--justifiably--poor first impression of us 'causing them to never come back to THE WELL again.
So, I walked back upstairs, found an old drum stick in the garbage an prepared myself for the worst.
(be warned, the image you're about to see is rated 'N' for NASTY...)
Yes, two peaces of POOP the size of small bricks. I can STILL smell it.
Of course I tried to flush 'em down! The water swirled around, doing it's best and the Grizzly Poop just laughed at it.
I was definitely going to have to break them apart.
You wouldn't believe how hard it was--no pun intended. I mean, it took me a good three minutes to break those suckers up. Holding my breath, trying not to look but having to peak now and again to see if I was making any progress in reducing the GIANT PIECES OF POOP to a manageable size.
The moment of truth.
Flush...
And, VICTORY!
No that drumstick is never going to see the light of day again.
And I'm SO happy to be a church planter, TV/Film producer, and POOP-BREAKER-UPPER I just have to friggin' GRIN from ear to ear.
Seriously though, it was a very good lesson in humility.
Plant a church. Clean the toilets.
Then go PREACH your butt off.
T
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