The long walk...

Took the wife walking in Santa Monica last week.

Lovely.

So's she, no? We kept getting stared at all day. Part of that is just L.A; everyone stares at you 'cause you never know when you might see 'someone', like Mos Def, who walked past us on the promenade.

Add to that the fact that my wife looks like a movie star and you get the picture.  In fact, she had the house car drive her up to the hotel where we were shooting one day partway through the day and the doormen were acting all silly with her, assuming she was famous. They even asked her where they knew her from.

She was quick to correct them.

I can see why they were acting silly though; she still makes me act silly.

The other day I was sitting at this here desk working and she walked into the room. I stopped and stared for a bit. She noticed me, smiled, then laughed. I joined her, making fun of the fact that--after 14 years--she still stops me dead in my tracks.

Good thing too.

Bit of a tense period for us right now.  Our house has sold, closes December 3rd and we don't know where we're going yet.  Naturally we're planning to stay close to home (what with a baby-church to steward and a our newly opened post facility 20 minutes away) but just the fact of selling has had us wondering about our life.

What's this all about, why are we doing this, where is this leading? 

Part of what's got us stressed is THE WELL not coming out of its summer slump yet. Before Easter 2010 we were averaging 74 people per week.  Summer hit and we dropped to between 50-60 which is totally normal for 'summertime church' in a North American context.

However, it's now mid-October and, so far, none of the missing people have come back.  This has us wondering if I've shrunk the church or if the Lord is shrinking it or if we're under some sort of focused 'season of trial' or if Burlington is just 'tough soil' (we know of three other church plants that didn't make it past year two) or if this is just par for the course in a culture where our peers didn't grow up going to church so Sunday attendance is always going to be a 'hit or miss' thing depending on how they feel week to week and what the weather's doing.

Makes it tough sledding though.

In addition to the above we're waiting to see what happens with the main TV series I produce by the end of the year.  We're working very hard on some syndication possibilities which, if they actually close, will open up some really neat opportunities for us.  If they don't close, well then, we'll be staring at the wall wondering what to do with our lives.

I've also got some interest in some 'micro-budget' films so I've got to get going on story development plus our first feature film looks like it might (MIGHT) have a theatrical release in the U.S upcoming (still not sure on that, we'll see...) plus there are two new TV series pending for next year (and one BIG one still quietly bubbling away on the back burner in NYC) and a couple of graphic novel projects that I really need to get up and off the ground before I get much older.

But, of course, none of the above is really 'solid'.  All of the above requires immense faith and perseverance and simple obedience.  All of it seems (by times) nebulous and uncertain.  

I do worry that I'm running out of steam.  I do worry that I've deluded myself.  I do worry that I'm the Emperor with no clothes; I imagine I can hear you snickering at me and my foolishness.

I've been going for lots of long early morning walks, doing my best to listen.

I go first, then my wife goes.

(babies still asleep at home)

Not *quite* as nice as when we did it together in Santa Monica but close enough.

Close enough...

T