Twelve years later...

So that was Niki and I walking down the isle twelve years ago this past Sunday, December 28th.

"Just Married..." as they say.

Funny thing is, we still feel that way.  We spent our anniversary with our babies for the first half of the day, then Niki's Mom came over to watch the kids so Nik and I could have the afternoon to ourselves.

We went out for lunch at a pub.  We bought her some Lulu pants and got mine hemmed.  We walked the streets of downtown Oakville.  Bought a bottle of our favorite wine.  Went grocery shopping.  Had a wonderful time.

Like a couple of old married folk.

As we drove I asked her to hit me with some of her favorite memories from the past twelve years.  She talked about the babies, our first place with Gord and Michelle, our early vacations, all the traveling we did in our twenties, setting up all our different houses, mentioned that she still feels like she's "playing house".

I talked about planting our Church and the first Sunday we cracked 200 and I knew we were going to be okay, my favorite chair in our first place and all the books I read sitting there with her, the first seven minutes into the first screening of my first feature-film and feeling that the audience was 'there' with us, our many trips together, dinners outside, and just sitting in our Muskoka (Adirondack) chairs together in the warm season.

So many memories.

She mentioned that in some ways it feels like we've been together forever and at other times she feels like it was just yesterday.

Like she's losing track of time.

I hooked on that for her anniversary card.  Remember what they say about time?  They say it flies when you're having fun.

Like us.

How is this applicable to you?

Well if you're thinking about getting married, or wondering why you got married, or just feeling a bit tired of the journey may we (gently) remind you that marriage can be a wonderful thing.  If you work at it, cultivate it, pour your heart and soul and dreams and body into it, it can turn out just fine.

Keep your wife the zenith of your desire and you'll be alright.  Orient your life around each other and you'll do fine.  Pursue the 'death of self' and the life of her and you'll survive.  Keep grabbing at her and showering with her and talking to her and dating her and making her breakfast and doing the things she likes to do and you just might thrive.

The point is that perseverance is everything.  Focus.  Training your entire life to the betterment of an other.

That's marriage.

It only works if you do it like that.

If you don't, you'll probably hate your life.

If you do build your life with that kind of focus you'll find yourself alive and well.

Needless to say (for this forum) that same kind of devotion 'plays' in your work as a Church Planter or a Movie Maker or a _____________ .  

Make a habit of self-examination.  Check your attitude each day, check your passion, check your focus, check your work ethic.  Make sure you're pouring yourself into your partner and into your offspring (if applicable) and into you work.

The whole deal with this 'life less ordinary thing' is that it's lots of hard work.

But, we're here to remind you (twelve years later) that there is a payoff.

Big time.

(should'a seen how good she looked later that night...)

Happy Anniversary.

Todd and Niki Cantelon

xo

T