Sleepless...

"Hi..." it's Me. 

Four in the morning. Saturday night. I've been up since two thirty.

Yes, I have to preach in the morning.

Funny though, I'm not feeling panicked like I should be feeling. Guess I've learned by this point that when you get a night like this you might as well do what you can to enjoy it.

Reason I'm up is twofold.

One, I've got a cold. The pain from it woke me up. I lay there for a while trying to get back to sleep but everything hurt enough that I couldn't. So, I caved, and took some cold medicine. Thing with that stuff (wonderful stuff that is) is that it sometimes keeps me up.

Tonight turned out to be one of the 'sometimes'.

Two, I've got things happening, and as a result, I'm thinking about those things, and as a result, my mind is racing.

= Sleeplessness.

Here's what I'm thinking about:

-Tomorrow is church at THE WELL. I've been thinking about worship (hoping it'll be as good as practice was yesterday/today). I've been thinking about my sermon, hoping it'll 'work' and hit people where they need to be hit. I've been thinking about our mission statement, realizing that the mission statement for my first church is still pretty dang good and that it might make sense to just re-adopt it. I'd made a new one when we launched THE WELL 'cause I thought it might be weird to use the old one but, hey, you know what they say about things that 'aint broke...

I'm thinking about this awesome space we saw tonight in our favorite area in Hamilton. I've been toying with launching a Sunday night service for THE WELL this fall. I've been looking for space and have been (as usual) hitting brick walls. This week I began thinking/praying for the Lord to lead me to the right space if He's 'in' the whole Fall thing. So tonight when my friend mentioned casually that he knew the dude who owned the space we were in and that he was looking to lease it out I starting hearing a 'Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!' in my head.

Plus the chandeliers are really cool.

I'm thinking about sailboats. Thinking about mine and the things I need to do to it.  I'm going to try and spend a full day working on it this week so the fam' can have our first sleepover on her sometime soon and so that Nik and I can sail her for a couple days deep into the lake in search of a secluded bay to call 'home' for a night with two of our closest friends.  I'm also (to keep it real) thinking about a bigger boat.  Found a real nice one online today (my wife's favorite one by the way). Just need a few deals to lock first.

What else is new?

I'm thinking about work, hoping that this deal FINALLY closes this week.  I'm brainstorming some new projects, feeling ready to burn the candle at both ends (like in 2008) for a bit.

I'm thinking about my friend whose divorce just became official this past week. We bumped into him randomly at the park today. He seemed real sad. I'm hoping I can get him to do some worship leading for us in the fall on Sunday nights at our new service (!)

I'm thinking about my other friend whose wife died ten days ago. He and his boy are on a 'man trip' to Florida. I'm praying for him lots, wondering what I'd be doing in his shoes.

I'm watching the rainstorm outside and our swaying trees and feeling thankful that I called "Raincheck!" on our first ever church picnic that was scheduled for tomorrow/today.

I'm thinking about this coming weekend where we're supposed to be going up to our friend's cottage with our kids and them and their kids PLUS another couple who are dear, dear, friends of ours with their kids. I'm realizing those are going to be some LATE night bonfires.  Can't wait for that.

I'm thinking about Jesus and sin and forgiveness and redemption and hope and despair and where I fit (as a preacher) in all that.

I'm thinking about how weird it is to feel like THE WELL has got some 'real' momentum under it even though we're smack dab in the middle of the summer slump. I'm thinking that's a good thing. I'm thinking about how I don't feel 'trapped' anymore (maybe for the FIRST time in my entire life). That's part of her legacy RD--for real. I'm thinking about my ordination (yes, you heard me) a week from today.

Heavy.

I'm thinking about my movie which might (at LONG last) have it's distribution deal locking down for later this year.

I'm thinking about getting old. It'll be forty for me in less time than I ever imagined possible and I was telling Nik in the car last night (tonight) that I still feel 24.

I'm thinking about this triathlon we've got coming up in 15 days and thinking my wife is a ball-breaking beast of a trainer but that her hard work is paying off 'cause I can run like the wind and not get tired these days and haven't been this skinny in 15 years.

(not that I'm 'skinny' or anything...)

I'm thinking about my kids growing up.

I'm thinking about my wife who I still love (and like) very much.

I'm thinking about our friends who've up and moved to L.A to pursue their dream. I'm missing them and admiring them and praying for them.

I'm thinking about breakfast and how friggin' tired I'm going to be trying to preach in the morning but that's got me thinking (and hoping) that the Lord's going to give me the grace I need.

Think I'll try to go back to sleep now...

(maybe)

T