catharsis...

That's what I looked like after I finished preaching yesterday.

Well, kinda.

It was my first time back at it in three and a half years and it went well.  In fact, during the second service (I had to preach it twice in the same morning--pretty typical for many Churches) I kind of lost my mind.

Just started weeping.

It wasn't that I was totally going crazy but that the text and content really got to me.  

Watching the audience I could see many in the rows close to me also starting to weep at various points which encouraged me that if I was falling prey to hysteria it was a least a group phenomenon.

Anyway, I finished and had to walk outside.

Where I promptly lost my marbles.

I mean, total breakdown.

Weeping.  Sobbing.  Snotting.  Really intense stuff.

I've had that kind of experience only a very few times in my life and have learned from those experiences to learn from experience.

Meaning--when you respond with deep (and I mean authentically, not trumped up, genuine heart-felt grief/empathy/relief) emotion to a situation, series of events or culmination of a season in your life, you should pay attention.

I've found that that kind of strong, honest, reaction is rare enough that you ought to sit up and take notice and find a way to make whatever changes are necessary in your life in order to align your day to day practice and reality with the life-themes and/or sense of calling that are at play in your reaction.

I'm not sure if they recorded the sermon, but if they did I'll post a link here so you can judge for yourself (!) as to whether or not I have, in fact, lost my marbles.

T