New Years-itis...

Pretty much my favorite moment of 2010 right there.

Sailing my wee boat through the cut and into the Toronto harbor on our way to a couple of nights at the Toronto Island Marina.

I'd been dreamin' about it for years.

I've told the story, right? Summer 2009, 'UP' has just come out, I'm sitting at the Bronte Harbor with my wife and kids eating ice cream staring at the sailboats coming and going and thinking--hoping--dreaming-praying, "Someday...someday, that'll be us!"

But I'd just seen 'UP' you see, and so I just up and said it to her.

"I don't care what it takes. I don't care how small we have to go to start, I'm buying a sailboat next year and we're going to get started..."

And we did.

So, when I took my boat, with my family aboard, through the Toronto Island cut and had to dodge the ferries and got to watch the planes come in (at what seemed) twenty feet above our heads and when I got to check in to the gas dock and the entire marina (it seemed) started coming over to meet the crazy family of six that would sail to the Island on a TWENTY FOUR foot boat, and when I got to motor us over to our slip and when we got to settle in for the night well...

It was a dream come true.

So there you go, friends and two thousand some blog readers, my New Years wish for you...

May your dreams (the best, most redemptively-charged of them) come true.

And may the fact that this one dream came true for me this year charge both you and me with faith that some of our dreams for 2011 might be worth the pursuing and that, they too, might in their time and turn...

Come true.

Happy New Year!

T

A love letter...

Yes Sir, fourteen years ago today.

Married a lovely lady.

'Cept she was a girl (20) then.

She looks much the same today as she did that day. I remember the day I knew I'd marry her. She was wearing a plaid bikini. No, it wasn't by the pool that I knew it, it was walking in the forest with her before. Know what did it?

She reminded me of my Mom.

No that 'aint weird, until I met my wife, my Mom was the best woman I knew. Smart, kind, hard-working, beautiful, friendly, bright-eyed, motivated, committed, kid-friendly, self-confident, spiritually alive.

Nik was like my Mom, first woman I'd ever met who resonated that way.

"Better marry that one quick. She's like a Ferrari..."

That's what my Dad said that day.

Guess he saw the same reflection I saw.

I know you hear it from folks like us all the time, "The years have just flown by. It just keeps getting better. I love her more today than the day I first fell in love with her." I know you don't believe it.

Believe me.

Love that girl.

That Niki.

My girlfriend.

Yes, she's my wife, has been for 14 years but, to me, she's still my girlfriend. That's why you marry a girl isn't it, so she can STAY your girlfriend forever?

Smokin' hot one too.

Wow.

Love ya' Niki.

Oh yes.

T

Reflection time...

The funny thing about plans is you've got to make them but, in making them, you're doing two things simultaneously; 1) opening yourself up to a sequence of events that will result in the 'best laid plans' coming to fruition and 2) opening yourself up to a sequence of events that will result in those same 'best laid plans' coming to naught.

Crazy right?

The tendency, when faced with this immutable fact of life is to freeze. That's right, stop.

Many people do this. You can spot 'em if you try, going through the motions of life with no real zest, or focus, or passion or drive or peace.

They're stopped.

I think the logic behind stopping is simple, "If I stop, I'm less likely to get hurt..."

I think that's true.

However, if you stop you're stopped.

It's a tough one.

Being the end of the year my thoughts are quite naturally turning to next year. Things slow down dramatically for me on the show biz front this time of year. We hustle our butts off from September until this week trying to get new contracts in place for next year then, the week before Christmas, everyone just checks out 'till at least the second week of January.

I think I've written at least ten TV series proposals in the past three months. So far none of 'em have locked. Looks like at least one or two of 'em will, but we won't know 'till mid-January earliest.

I could fret about it, but instead I've learned to just enjoy the enforced silence and idleness of these three weeks and to take advantage of the opportunity to sit still and play with my kids and enjoy friends and family.

It's like the breakneck speed at which we live the year slows down for a bit and I get a chance to reflect.

"What do you want to do next year?"

Which leads to, "What do you want to DO?"

Which leads to, "What are you SUPPOSED to be doing?"

Which requires a lot of quiet sitting and reflecting.

I hope you take some time this week and next to do just that.

Sit still, drink some egg nog (with RUM in it) watch the fire and listen to what God might be calling you to DO with 2011, and with your life.

Happy Holidays kids.

T

Let's try this again...

The kiddoes at 'Brookfield Place' downtown T.O this week.

We were there for our annual 'Christmas in Toronto' trip. Had a good time despite super-frigid temps.

Got home to some bleak times as the workers downstairs at our rental did their best (while building a basement apartment) to drive us absolutely nuts.

We may have to move sooner rather than later.

The wife cracked a bit because of it. I wrote a post about it this morning but, due to extreme bleakness, I deleted it and am writing this one in its place.

Lemme' just say that dislocation 'aint fun, especially for my sweet wife who's wired for home and family (and the odd overseas trip and monthly 'date') more than anything else.

All I can do is keep working.

It'd be nice to SNAP! my fingers and make 200K appear out of nowhere so I could buy her the house she *really* wants but, since that's not in the cards, all I can do is keep working.

It's of some comfort (and help with our praying) that I actually have projects, finished and percolating, that have actual potential to yield some kind of snappy return in the next few months. It's one thing to pray on a wing and a prayer, another altogether to pray with focus connected to work you've already done and continue to do.

And while I'm waiting for God to do whatever it is that He's going to do, all I can do is keep working.

So come on flagship biography series, start re-selling already! Come on pending talk television series (4 of 'em), lock down already! You go, micro-budget feature-film about to distribute (at long LONG last); sell a million tickets already! Come on Hugh Hefner bio, work your magic already! Let's get busy TV drama series, you can become a reality! I believe in you graphic novel projects #1 and #2, you've got what it takes to really make an impact! 100 more bio-series episodes? I can SO do that! Do your thing baby church, you're growing at 43% in attendance and 57% in giving compared to last year, all I need you to do is DOUBLE in size by Easter 2011.

That's all.

As I said, all I can do it keep working...

And keep praying.

T

New digs...

Finally making some headway at our new studio/post-production space.

Had a 'civilized' lunch in it yesterday. All the art's up and the books are comin' in and the white board is up in the story-development/boardroom area.

Cool.

Funny thing is, it feels so familiar. It's the *same* office I've always had (since getting my official 'start' on my own as a producer in 1998), just a slightly fancier version.

There's a life-lesson there. I think so long as you're doing what you're called to do things don't every get really wildly different, they just grow incrementally (sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly) but if you're really in the 'zone' of what you've been 'made' to do, it seems to me that what you're doing and where you're doing it (since 'space' is a reflection of head-space) should always feel familiar.

Interesting.

Makes me think about the things I do and how to zone in on 'em while staying hands-off enough (on the faith side to allow room for God to be God, on the show-biz side to allow space for the creative process to unfold as it wants to) so that things happen in the way they're supposed to happen without too much manipulation from my side of things.

Learning the practice of practiced un-practice.

T

Tough action...

Yes, that's our mini-van with the captains chairs out as we get ready to clear it out to use for the move last week.

Crazy thing is we clean the thing out every single week. Wild. I mean, look at that filth! That's what four kids will do to you. Imagine if we didn't clean it consistently!

Then, the next morning, I pulled up with the moving truck and started loading. This is the first box, first step, first action that felt truly irreversible.

Tough action.

It was hard moving. It's still hard. My wife and I aren't talking about it it's that hard. See, we lived in our last house for almost seven years. By FAR the longest we'd ever lived anywhere. We moved 13 times in the early years of our marriage then slowed down considerably. Four years in the Beach (Toronto) six and a half years in Burlington.

That's what four kids will do to you.

Make you stable, and your cars filthy.

Our rental house is fine, small, with a fireplace (which is nice for winter) and centrally located. The problem is we're not even hanging pictures, which is making us feel unsettled which is exactly *why* we're not hanging pictures.

Makes you feel lonely in your own life.

We're 'using' it (the loneliness) though. Every time we feel frustrated or sad or dislocated or disconnected we channel the angst of that into forward thinking energy. We fixate on what's to come.

"But you don't know what's to come..."

Exactly.

Please allow myself to quote myself...

"The only thing the wife and I find difficult about Faith, is Faith..."

Yes.

It's hard to believe.

So what do you do?

Well, you work hard. Clean the car even though you know it's going to get dirty again. Wash the floors in your humble rental house. Keep looking at houses for sale even though it's two weeks before Christmas so there's nothing for sale. Keep believing that the right house is out there. Keep praying about it in front of your kids. Do the simple things (like breakfast and working out and walks with the kids for hot chocolate, and wine with the wife and lovemaking) you need to do to try and help your life 'feel' normal even though it's not.

Keep taking the tough action needed to find your way forward.

That's what we're doing these days.

T'will be interesting to see how this all turns out.

I've got some cool things brewing (in the meantime) on the business front which is helping us with all the 'blind faith' required around here. I'll update you on that in a day or so. In the meantime...

'Joyeux Noel' everybody.

T

A Christmas message...

I feel like I always do my *best* work in and around the Christmas and Easter seasons respectively. My preaching work that is.

This past Sunday was a real treat. I preached so hard I almost threw my back out.

Just listened to it, told the wife after; 'Man, somebody should LOCK me up...'

Yeah, it was THAT kind of sermon.

Thought it might be of encouragement to you (and some folks you might know) today.

Blessings on you this Season...

T

"NOW UNTO HIM..."

Back to basics...

Moved into our new (temporary) place this week.

That's the living room, all decked out for Christmas. Probably the most Christmasy living room we've every had.

Tell you what, having a fireplace for a few months is going to make us make sure the house we buy next has one too.

Move was hard.

We were really organized, but it's always tough. The second day was the worst, nearly sixteen hours long. We're still exhausted from it, two days later.

It took all our strength to up and leave our old place. We really loved it. Had always dreamed of living in that neighborhood but 1) we outgrew it (2 kids when we got it, 4 now) and 2) it's not good (in our opinion) to get too 'settled' somewhere. We find that allowing a 'settlers mindset' to creep in (instead of a 'Sojourners' one) blunts your thirst for the fields of the Lord.

So we moved.

Almost as an act of obedience (or 'Mitzvah' for the Jews) as if we're saying with our actions that we believe there *will* be a better (or more interesting, or more challenging, or more fulfilling, or more stretching or more fun) tomorrow out there for us.

It's tough though. We're feeling this loss for sure.

But simple things are helping. Things like breakfast today (same as always--except the rental kitchen is even LESS user-friendly than that of our last home) or a living room set up for Christmas.

I just finished writing my first sermon in this house. Sat at the dining room table ('cause I don't--and won't--have an office here) put on my headphones and the same CD I've been writing sermons to since I was 20, pulled up a half glass of vino rosso, and did it.

Like I always do.

And it was good. I mean, I haven't preached it yet--tomorrow will tell the tale--but I *know* in my bones that it'll be alright.

Just like I know there's a home out there for us and that a fire's a good thing to have and that my wife and kids are excited for Christmas.

Now if only the Christmas present at the top of MY list didn't cost $50,000...

"Dearest Santa..."

T

Life enema...

What is that...14...books?

Sermon books.

That's right. And I've got one in my briefcase right now so that makes 15 books.

Sermon books.

Dating back to 1994 if you can believe it.

Yes, we're moving, which means moving my office, which means making sure all my 'essential' files and hard drives and study books and notes and sermon books get moved.

Crazy.

Been doing this a while.

15 books.

That's a lot of preaching.

Another box has five (5) personal hard drives to go to the office to join (conservatively) another 20 drives that we have there.

That's a lot of producing.

I was well and duly reminded on the road today that, encroaching mid-life crisis notwithstanding, I HAVE *actually* found a way to DO a few things in my life. Sure, I've got lots left to do and learn but (for the first time maybe *ever*) I felt today like there MIGHT be a chance that I've not completely wasted my life or totally missed the boat.

I get to feeling that way sometimes.

You know, like Al Bundy?

That suburban dude who's landed in this *life* that he never wished for. Y'know how that feels?

Crappy.

"Quit whining..." you say.

Well, I see your point but I also see my life and the way it feels sometimes and the honest truth is that sometimes I don't like it. Sometimes I feel like a friggin' hamster on a treadmill and, seeing as our friend's hamster just died on his friggin' treadmill two weeks back, that doesn't make me feel too happy.

"Grow up..." you say. "Get some manliness..." you say. "Your self-serving navel-gazing is getting tiresome..." you say.

I see you point.

But here's how I deal with the feelings of despair and darkness, with that sense of 'you missed it', that fearful wondering if I'm ever *actually* going to MAKE IT.

I look back.

And see 15 sermon books and 25 hard drives.

Reminds me, I've done some work and I've got some work to do.

Number 1 reason we're moving?

To *act* out our faith that MORE is possible, that THIS isn't *all* there is, that the HORIZON *does* have something wonderful beyond it, that we have SOMEWHERE to go, that we *haven't* arrived...

That we still believe in the possible.

On with the move.

On with life.

On with dreaming.

On with sojourning.

On with achieving.

On with redemption.

On with writing.

On with preaching.

On with producing.

On with loving Jesus and my wife and my babies and my job(s) and my freakin' sailboat.

On with it.

T

Where is it?

Gotta' (gently) weigh in here.

Got shook up yesterday by a blog post I found via a friendly acquaintance of mine who's a fellow church planter. You can read the post HERE.

See?

Troubling.

Even if you've never planted a church you've surely started something that's failed.

The challenge with a church plant failing is that it's an extremely public failure and it's a failure that has impact in many (many) lives.

Publicly, you feel like an idiot and know that all your church planting peers are shaking their heads, thanking God it wasn't them, and some of them are thinking (if not saying) that you probably never 'had what it took' in the first place.

Terrifying.

Personally, you feel like an idiot for all the time, money, effort and heart people have expended to help you get something started that you couldn't see through to success.

You are a failure.

You suck.

That's how you're feeling.

Then the triage starts. "How can we fix this? What do we need to do to make the hurt go away? How can we save our reputation? What about that paycheck, where's the next one coming from? Do you think they HATE me? What is 'so-and-so' saying about me?"

Terrible.

Then the blog gets written, taking a look back, trying to figure out where it started to go wrong. Other church planters get on it, start passing it around, like pictures of a car wreck. Pretty soon everybody knows. "Hey aren't you that guy who failed in __________?"

Yeah, that's me.

Wanna' give me a job? I swear I won't fail this time. I've learned my lesson.

Really?

How do you know, I mean really know?

And in the midst of all the advice blog posts swirling around out there ("Do this, make sure you don't do that...") I find a gaping hole.

Nobody's talking about The Spirit.

Nobody's asking if their worship was FULL OF THE SPIRIT, if their preaching was fit to REND THE HEAVENS so soaked in the Ghost it was. If they prayed for the sick, the broken-hearted and hemmed-in on a regular basis and saw the Mighty Lord answer those prayers by times.

Nobody's talking about CHARISMA! The real kind, not your personal magnetism, but the MAGNETIC, ENERGETIC, FRENETIC, CACOPHONIC, Presence of the Most High God at work in your work.

Seems to me if you got the Ghost you're going to be fine. If you don't you're dead, no matter how hip, or focused, or visionary, or well-managed, funded, or planned you are.

"But believers are all filled with the Holy Spirit upon conversion..."

Yeah, yeah.

In-dwelled by the Spirit.

I'm talking about the ANOINTING, IN-FILLING, BAPTISING, GIFTING, MANIFEST Presence of the Holy Spirit at work in the midst of His people for the Father's glory, His people's salvation and joy, and the good of all people.

Where is it?

WHERE'S THE FREAKIN' GHOST IN YOUR WORK, SON?

T

Back to the start...

Last Friday I hosted a local TV show based out of the studio in which I got my start as a TV host/producer almost 18 years ago.

'Eighteen years ago...'

Crazy.

Show was fun. It was 'open line' which means it was at least possible that no one would call which would have left me sitting there for an hour and a half staring at the camera. 

Nightmare. 

But, that didn't happen. We had non-stop calls all night.

We were talking sex.

Well, sex and marriage.

Always a great 'go to' topic if you're looking to create media that begets a reaction.  

And a reaction we begot.

My blog (this here one) and my church's website spiked HUGE in the four or five days following my appearance. Literally thousands of visits in less than a week. 

Means people were watching and talking about it.

Cool.

It was fun for me to go back to the first format I ever dipped my toe into as a TV guy.  I was still good at it, in fact, all these (18) years later I slipped into using the same catchphrases I used to use to elicit phone-in response.

Funny.

The brain is like a muscle, it has memory.

The upshot for me was another affirmation (or stern reminder) that I 'inhabit' a very specific 'zone' in terms of my area of giftedness in show biz.  The upshot of that realization is twofold, 1) try to keep finding contexts that suit my limited ability and 2) work very hard when I'm in a setting that is outside of my area of giftedness.  

Just 'cause you're not 'gifted' at something doesn't mean you have to 'suck' at it but it does mean that you have to compensate for your lack of natural ability with tenacity, work ethic, focus and follow-through.

Anyway, t'was fun and a real learning experience.

You can enjoy the opener (and a laugh at my expense) HERE.

T

R-RATED MARRIAGE

Remember THIS post?

I'm talking about it RIGHT NOW (1-2:30am EST)  *live* on CTS TV.  

For local listings check HERE, and HERE.

I'm also be tweeting throughout the program.

You can also EMAIL me:

toddc@tmginc.com

Would love for you to stop by on the phone to help me spice things up a bit.

T

Like flies to honey...

See that dude to the left of frame?

He's busy rushing the set of one of the music videos I produced this weekend. When he gets there he'll grab the artist-mid performance-then start screaming at us for making noise at night (despite our permit from the city to be there doing just that) and refuse to leave the set for 30minutes.

I had to call the cops.

I feel like I attract crazy people these days.

Is it my fault? Maybe. Maybe it's 'cause I'm so good looking, or nice, or well-spoken? Maybe it's because I'm so mean, self-focused and determined.

Dunno'.

Once the cops got there, things got better.

The flame effects were pretty cool though...

And the artist (in the middle above) and Director, whose shoot this was (pictured on the dolly foreground) were both happy with things which means I might get to work with them again and might get to keep their friendship despite the fact of working together.

That can be a thorny one.

In fact, I've been bitten in the butt more times working with friends than I have with crazy people storming my sets or my church.

Crazy.

Sometimes, I get to feeling a bit tired of it. Tired of causing friction, tired of being a 'lightning rod'.  Some days I think a factory job might be nice.  The machines don't talk back (I know this--I worked at the Mississauga Pepsi plant for a few months back in the day) and the paychecks come nice and regular.

But, the day inevitably came where I got 'ahead' of the machine and had some time to rip off a piece of cardboard from a Pepsi 24-case and write down on it my goals for the next ten years (2000-2010).

Since 2010 is almost done, I figured I'd revisit that list sometime soon for you.

But today, I gotta' rest a bit.

The crazy people have made me tired.

T

doin' work...

Getting busier over here.

The last two weeks have fair flown by.  Friday/Monday past I was helping a friend of mine with one of his core clients. We used our studio for the shoot. T'was fun to see the space being used. 

(for clarity we don't *own* the studio but have an ongoing relationship set up with the owners that allows us to use it for the work we do...)

Yesterday I had a major meeting with one of Canada's most powerful TV executives.  I was really looking forward to sitting down with him; it's not everyday you get to meet a guy whose work has influenced your work.

Fun times.

The meeting went well, we connected, he was pleased with the work we're doing for him and my sense of things is that we might have some more work to do for him in the near future.

Meanwhile, over at THE WELL, we've finally seemed to get some 'post summer momentum' back.  Our last two weeks have seen us back up to pre-summer numbers and that's a real mercy. For a while there (like since May) we were wondering if I'd killed the church or something.

Anyhow, it 'feels' like this momentum might stay with us through Christmas.

I also started workshopping a couple new feature film concepts with a very talented writer-friend of mine.  The upside of this one is that my Executive Producer already has an 'output deal' in place for the films we'll create from these scripts.  The downside is the budget attached to this output deal is comically small.  We're going to find a way to do it, just for the sake of doing it--to keep practicing and getting better and putting work 'out there'.

I'm a guest tonight on a local late-night phone in talk show (like the one I hosted when I got my start in TV) and it looks like I'm going to guest-host it on Friday the 12th of November, which should be fun.

The idea that's been really sticking with me the past few weeks (and I've been hit with it before) is the whole notion that 'doing work' is simple, humble, faithfulness-requiring stuff.

Like laying bricks.

So whether it's been teaching a 'Christianity: 101' class with all my heart to a very small room, or preparing my sermon like it really matters, or carrying a tripod like a PA, or supervising a story meeting or pitching a mogul in my best "My don't you look like a cutting-edge writer/producer" outfit...

I'm just faithfully trying to (as my super-successful friend puts it) do an 'honest day's work' each and every day.

Layin' bricks.

T

Up to some good...

Busy times over here.

Yesterday I spent so much time crunching numbers and staring at the wall thinking about the endless variables that would be put into effect as a result of said crunching that, by four PM or so, my head felt like mush.

The life of a producer.

Today is no better.

Since about 6:30AM I've been on email, online, getting things cleared and set.

I'm about to go sit with the wife for a bit just to see her for twenty minutes or so.

8:00AM I leave the house, pick up photo prints for a big presentation today and some promo cards for THE WELL.

8:30-9:00AM I prep for a meeting with my biz partner.

9:00-10:00AM said meeting with biz partner, making sure our heads are screwed on straight regarding a big new production that's looming.

10:00AM-12:00PM big new client meeting.

12:30PM lunch with a TV host who wants to pick my brain and maybe have me on his show as a guest.

1:30-2:00pm some sermon planning and phone calls on two music videos I'm producing.

2:00-3:30pm story meeting to try and zone in on several GREAT ideas for a couple of small (very small) feature films we might have on the back burner.

4:00-5:00pm more sermon/music video planning.

6:00pm leave for football practice with my son.

8:45pm sit down with the wife.

Happy days people, happy days.

T

Universal hope...

This is good stuff...

It proves two things:

One--sorrow is universal. We all suffer. We all have pain.

Two--hope is also universal and springs eternal.

I will be keeping this song and its message in mind as I:

One--lay my friend's baby boy to rest tomorrow presiding over my first funeral.

Two--preach about grace, peace, mercy and hope this Sunday at THE WELL as if it's real and as if I believe it and as if it's just for my friends and for Heaven who, I'm sure, will be listening.

Not 'cause it's *me* but 'cause:

One--sorrow is universal and...

Two--so is hope.

T

Lost at sea...

I've been getting in some wild 'Fall sails' this month.  

Good thing too 'cause I've been feeling that way (lost at sea) lately.  It's been a tough couple months at the church and with the end of my current 'pay cycle' looming and our house sold with nowhere to move to yet and, really, nothing but uncertainty on the docket it's felt like grey clouds all around.

It's been really getting to us.

So much so, that I didn't think I was going to be able to preach this week.  That's one of the trickiest things about preaching week in and week out, finding a way to have something to 'say' from Scripture that's not really about you, and is worth your people's time and is open and vulnerable to the Holy Spirit...

Even when you're feeling about as far from life, hope and light as can be.

(I refer to this as 'learning how to preach 'The Light' from the darkness')

I had my text picked and kept reading it over and over all week and thinking about it, just letting it percolate in my subconscious.  I dissected it on Friday (which is later than I usually do it) but just couldn't bring myself to write it on Friday night even though Nik was out and the kids were asleep and I had the perfect window.

I was waiting for the 'spark'.

Saturday was early morning football with Jordan and the fam', then off to see about getting winter storage for my boat, then back home to clean, then off to Niki's Mom's for late thanksgiving.  I brought my stuff with me but wasn't in a hurry to get to it.  I sat in the sun in the backyard and enjoyed my wife and her mom and two aunts and my kids and a wonderful meal.  Two glasses of red in quick succession helped me relax and forget my sorrows for a moment or two.

After dessert I felt the 'spark'.  It was small, almost a non-event, but there.  Nik was going to lie down for a minute so I asked her if she'd mind if I sat down and at least got started.  She was cool with it so I pulled out my notebook, opened my Bible, pulled out my notes and started writing.

It just flowed.

I mean, effortlessly.  Wrote it in half the time I usually do.  Felt great.  Got it off my chest in time to really enjoy the last event of the day--a 13th birthday party for the eldest daughter of some of our closest friends.

Came home, slept like a baby, woke up yesterday feeling great, and preached my a$$ off.  I mean, it was fun, funny, open, honest, real, powerful and on-message in terms of what a 'sermon' is supposed to be in a Jesus-loving church.

I was amazed.

And humbled.

Reminded again that 'this' doesn't really have all that much to 'do' with us.  We're participants, sure, but we're also passengers.  

Carried along by the wind of the Spirit.

And then it hit me--all this great wind I've been experiencing on my 'Fall sails' lately? 

Always accompanied by dark clouds and foreboding seas.

Just like my life.

Point taken.

T

The long walk...

Took the wife walking in Santa Monica last week.

Lovely.

So's she, no? We kept getting stared at all day. Part of that is just L.A; everyone stares at you 'cause you never know when you might see 'someone', like Mos Def, who walked past us on the promenade.

Add to that the fact that my wife looks like a movie star and you get the picture.  In fact, she had the house car drive her up to the hotel where we were shooting one day partway through the day and the doormen were acting all silly with her, assuming she was famous. They even asked her where they knew her from.

She was quick to correct them.

I can see why they were acting silly though; she still makes me act silly.

The other day I was sitting at this here desk working and she walked into the room. I stopped and stared for a bit. She noticed me, smiled, then laughed. I joined her, making fun of the fact that--after 14 years--she still stops me dead in my tracks.

Good thing too.

Bit of a tense period for us right now.  Our house has sold, closes December 3rd and we don't know where we're going yet.  Naturally we're planning to stay close to home (what with a baby-church to steward and a our newly opened post facility 20 minutes away) but just the fact of selling has had us wondering about our life.

What's this all about, why are we doing this, where is this leading? 

Part of what's got us stressed is THE WELL not coming out of its summer slump yet. Before Easter 2010 we were averaging 74 people per week.  Summer hit and we dropped to between 50-60 which is totally normal for 'summertime church' in a North American context.

However, it's now mid-October and, so far, none of the missing people have come back.  This has us wondering if I've shrunk the church or if the Lord is shrinking it or if we're under some sort of focused 'season of trial' or if Burlington is just 'tough soil' (we know of three other church plants that didn't make it past year two) or if this is just par for the course in a culture where our peers didn't grow up going to church so Sunday attendance is always going to be a 'hit or miss' thing depending on how they feel week to week and what the weather's doing.

Makes it tough sledding though.

In addition to the above we're waiting to see what happens with the main TV series I produce by the end of the year.  We're working very hard on some syndication possibilities which, if they actually close, will open up some really neat opportunities for us.  If they don't close, well then, we'll be staring at the wall wondering what to do with our lives.

I've also got some interest in some 'micro-budget' films so I've got to get going on story development plus our first feature film looks like it might (MIGHT) have a theatrical release in the U.S upcoming (still not sure on that, we'll see...) plus there are two new TV series pending for next year (and one BIG one still quietly bubbling away on the back burner in NYC) and a couple of graphic novel projects that I really need to get up and off the ground before I get much older.

But, of course, none of the above is really 'solid'.  All of the above requires immense faith and perseverance and simple obedience.  All of it seems (by times) nebulous and uncertain.  

I do worry that I'm running out of steam.  I do worry that I've deluded myself.  I do worry that I'm the Emperor with no clothes; I imagine I can hear you snickering at me and my foolishness.

I've been going for lots of long early morning walks, doing my best to listen.

I go first, then my wife goes.

(babies still asleep at home)

Not *quite* as nice as when we did it together in Santa Monica but close enough.

Close enough...

T

At play with Mr. Hefner...

'Yours Truly' prepping an interview.

Looks like I could be outside Hart House at U of T right?

Nope.

The door you see behind me is actually the side entrance to Hugh Hefner's private study at the Playboy Mansion.

That's right.

Don't believe me?

There we are (my biz partner and I with Hef) after finishing the interview in the infamous 'Library/Movie Theater' which is just outside the office I was talking about.

What an experience.

Thursday of last week.  The last day of three days shooting in H'wood that saw me do 33 interviews with some really interesting folk ranging from Wayne Brady to 'MACHETE!' to America's 6th richest man.

Oh, and Hugh Hefner.

I was pretty nervous going into it.  See, Mr. Hefner is 85 and a little hard of hearing. He's also HUGH HEFNER which means he's, understandably, a little tired of doing stupid interviews. His handlers sat me down (on the above bench) before the interview, gave me some specific instructions and wished me the best.

I braced myself for one of 'those' interviews.

You know, the ones that suck?

See, the more famous and powerful the person the less inclined they typically are to really 'give' of themselves in an interview.  I mean, on the one hand, why should they?  Why should they allow me, and by extension you, the viewer, to trespass on their life?  They didn't sign up to become a cultural icon or hero, they didn't ask to be an example.

Yet here we are, wanting to 'learn' from their story.

We had been given just an hour to get completely set up.  You should've seen my DP sweating. There were eight of us there plus the Playboy archivists (yes, it's true, they record EVERYTHING...) plus a couple of Hugh's girlfriends circulating in the house and then there he was, the man himself.

He walked in, real quiet.  Stood for his photos, real quiet.

I'm watching, going, 'Man, he's real quiet. Oh no...'

Then we sit down, start rolling, and me and Hef start talking.

And he was brilliant.

Totally present, totally open, smart as a whip, totally engaged, transparent and willing to 'go there' with me wherever I went.

My wife (who was in L.A with me for the first time) told me afterward that she had to remember to keep breathing, she was so engrossed in what was going on.

After we wrapped, Hef's crew told us that was the best interview they'd ever seen him give. "Man, you got stuff out of him I've NEVER heard him talk about, and we've heard him talk about everything..."

We exited the house, stood outside in the sun, soaking in the beautiful grounds and the fact that, unless there's a party going on, this house is just a house, when Hef appears on the grass walking towards us.

"Hey, you know, I was just thinking..." he says, then goes on to explain one of the key points he was making with an added historical nuance that he wants to make sure we don't miss.  I tell him we'll be sure to explore that and mention that if we could have access to his archives for supporting material that'd be most helpful.  He smiles, winks, then nods to his VP of PR. 

We shake hands. Three Bunny's come out of the house, pile into a limo, and off they go--to a theater opening or something.

Hef.

85, very smart, very open and (according to the interview) possessed of a life history with just as much pain and suffering as you.

Maybe more.

Eye opening stuff.

T

A good helper...

"And the Lord God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him..."

-Gen 2:18 (NKJV)

Now, I realize that some of you might bristle a bit at the thought of a woman as a designed 'helper' to a man. To that I say, this is my blog and I'll cry if I want to. Or, this is my blog and I'll live and write from a Biblical worldview if I want to.

Doesn't mean you have to.

I'm sure Gloria would *love* a visit.

That said, I wanted to point out my beautiful wife up there because she helped me today.  She was helping me the day my youngest son took the above shot.  We were sailing to Toronto and Niki spent the trip sitting at the stern to 1) keep me company (it was a long sail) and 2) to watch the wind and the weather systems so that she could 3) grab the tiller if/when I needed to make sail changes to keep us moving and safe.

A good helper.

A friend of mine put it this way, "God gave women to men as helpers because men *need* help..."

It's true.

We had a chat this morning. She came on pretty strong, pointed out some things I was missing and urged me to take right action.  I listened (mad at first) but--seeing as she knows me better than anyone else alive--I listened good, got over my anger, weighed what she was saying, sat on it a bit, then took right action.

Thanks Nik.

If you're a man and you have a good godly wife, listen to her.

She's there to help.

If you're a man who's older than 22, has a job, and is still single go find a wife quick...

You could use the help.

T

As weeks grow...

It's tough, right?  See, I've got this blog that lots of people read and I've got this urge, see? I have an urge to TELL.

But then, sometimes, things happen that you can't talk about.

We had a 'Police Event' at THE WELL on Sunday. It was bad, that's all I can say.

Not enough, right?

Lemme' say this; as a Pastor/Church Planter you have to keep the safety of your people in mind at all times. That means, that when $hit gets 'real' you have to be ready and able to do the right thing in the moment.

This is part of what being a Biblical Elder is all about. Being a 'manly' enough man that you can take strong decisive action when it's needed and being a 'godly' enough man that you know what's right in the moment.

That was Sunday. 9.1.1, cruisers, violence.

At church.

Awesome right?

The upshot of it is we'll have security posted for the next month and we'll be praying like mad (started last night) that things settle down.  

We'll also keep growing.

That's right, growing.  

See, I've found that suffering or trail can either destroy you or it can galvanize action. I'm betting (and feeling) that the latter is going to be the operative one in this case. It's funny, we were in a really good space through the summer then, all of a sudden, in the past two months every key leader we have seemed to get hit with trial after trial after trial.

When it happens like that you sit up and take notice.  You go, "Okay Lord, this feels like opposition. Please help us do what's needed and thank you for what You're already doing and please keep us all safe through this..." and then you keep going.

But it's been strange.

See, we've got big plans for the new year--yes, we're already planning the new year, we're like fashion retailers we church builders--and we're planning big things.  The reason is not because we want to do big things, although we'd be lying if we didn't admit we hope the things we do find their way to being 'successful', but because we want to be effective.

Church is about effectively communicating and embodying hope.  

Yes, that hope is vested/rested in Jesus which makes Church different from all other endeavors, but the urge to do something 'useful' and 'good' for people is surely something you can identify with regardless of the 'creed' that dominates your days.

So we're looking to build, to grow to expand.

And that's going to mean stretching, and hoping and believing and trusting and risking.

Then I ran the numbers today, comparing the first three weeks of our first year together as a church and the last three weeks (starting our second year in existence) and I noticed that our attendance is up 10% which is not anything to get nuts over but is simple and good. Our giving numbers, on the other hand, are off the chain; up 68% year over year.  

Now that's something to get excited about.

Because it speaks to faithfulness, Gods faithfulness to us through His faithful people.

Good things.

So, despite cops and courts and fights and shouting and fear and uncertainty we're feeling good about things over here.

Real good...

T

The Dog Whisperer...

Meet "Molly".

She's our neighbors' dog.  They're in Germany so we're dog-sitting her. "Strange..." you think, "Todd and Niki aren't really 'dog' people..."

Exactly.

But, we like our neighbors and, since they asked, we were happy to do it.

Now, let's be real, they DO drop by my blog once in a while so I'm going to be sensitive but I'm also going to be honest 'cause, man, I've been learning some things.

See, my wife and kids have 'left the building'.  This is due to our house being listed.  As I'm sure you can appreciate, keeping a house 'show ready' 'aint exactly a piece of cake with FOUR kids living in it.

So, she's gone to her Mom's for a few days in the hopes that we sell quick.  "What happens next week?" Each day has sufficient worry for itself we say. We're not thinking about next week, we're hoping the house sells THIS week.  "Good luck with that..." you say. Oh you of little faith I say.  "Religious fanatic..." you say...

Cuss you out, I say.

Seriously, Molly has been making me cuss a lot.

Like when walking her she stops (abruptly pulling on her leash, sitting her stubborn butt down, glaring at me as if to say "Just TRY and move me you big dummy") on some neighbor's lawn 'cause (imagine it) she's spotted a piece of dried poop which she MUST sniff, roll around in repeatedly until she has green stripes of it on her fur, then EAT.

Like I said, I'm not a 'dog person', I don't know if this is 'normal dog behavior' and since her owners are in Germany I figure let the dog do what it wants.  They can bath her when they get back.

Oh yeah, then there's the whole, "I'm going to just run around in circles chasing my tail and growling..." bit while I'm trying to eat my cereal.  What's that all about?  Reminds me how futile our endless attempts to entertain ourselves are. We're chasing our own tails.  Makes me want to make media that 'matters'.

How 'bout the whole, she sits under my desk while I'm sermonizing licking at her chapped feet until they bleed so much it turns the fur on her face red, bit?  I'm sitting there (smelling wet, bloody dog) thinking, "I don't even know how to help or heal myself. I'm like this stupid dog, totally helpless."

Then, when I'm trying to put her in her house 'cause she likes the smells there and I have to go out to a meeting for a bit and she pulls away from me so hard she pulls the leash right off her head and refuses to come even though I'm commanding her sternly to the point that I get angry and rush towards her, she lifts her paw to defend herself 'cause she thinks I'm going to hit her and I realize that I'm just like her, defenseless in the face of an angry 'god'.

And she misses her parents, like I miss mine. And her 'home' isn't home without them just like my life is empty without Jesus in it and yours is too (even if you won't admit it).

Then I'm walking her tonight (we had a great walk) and she keeps pulling ahead of me and this makes me think, "Man, a dog will ALWAYS take as much leash as you give it..." which is JUST like me, the dude who never has enough, never knows when to call it quits and really struggles with dying to his appetites.

Then she poops (and I've been dreading this part) and I've got to pick it up with the plastic bag and I've NEVER done it (cause I grew up in an age when you just let your dog poop and that was that) and--as I do--I can FEEL the heat and the squishiness of it and it makes me sick and I think, "Man, this is just like my life, running ahead of my Master while He patiently walks with me waiting for me to crap myself so He can stoop and take responsibility for it."

The Gospel.

According to Molly.

Sheesh.  Do I have a lot to learn...

T

One more time...

So we're 'house fluffing'--and *yes* I know that reference might be a bit risque but if you 'get' the reference you're risque enough to deal with it.

This means lots and lots of painting.  Six gallons worth.  I realize there are only four in the shot, but I was just getting started when I took it.

Six gallons.

That's a lot of paint.

And as a result of this fluffing, and the season it means the wife and I are in, you're likely to get quite a few renovation-oriented pithy-truisms thrown at you in the coming weeks on this here blog as a result.

The truism from last night...

Every freakin' time I come back to painting, after swearing I'll never paint again, I start out thinking, "THIS time I'm only going to do ONE coat. One real good coat, but JUST one coat..." Then I let it cure, look at it, sigh and...

Do another coat.

That's the difference (I think and hope) between the 'chosen' and the 'passed over', between the 'elite' and the 'also ran', between the 'doers' and the 'dreamers'.

Do it right, every time, even though you're sick and tired and depressed and stressed and stretched and the LAST thing you want to do is expend any more effort than you have to.

As I stood there looking at the first coat I thought of all the times I walk into houses and can see that the numb-nuts, who calls himself a 'man', who lives there only did one coat and I shake my head, put my shoulders back and resolve not to be a numb-nuts.

That's why I always do the second coat.

Even though (left to my own devices) I don't *want* to.

Happy painting kids.

T

ps: THIS is what I was thinking a year ago today... (just scroll down to Sept 16)

It's the little things...

Like sailing to pick up your coffee for 'staff meeting'.

You're looking at my boys Miki and Jurgens getting the latter dude's sailboat snugged into the visitors berth at the Williams Cafe on the waterfront in the great city of Hamilton after our 25 minute 'beat' (sailing upwind) from the south end of Hamilton bay to the north end where the sweet coffee dwells.

We were scheduled to meet yesterday to discuss our ongoing expansion plans for THE WELL and--since I'm not a guy who really loves meetings--we've figured out a way to do our meetings while doing something I love, which is sailing.

The idea is, if we're going to sail, I won't dread the meeting.

Naturally, I'm not THAT much of a freak about it (winter will eventually come and what of sailing then?) but the reason I'm mentioning it here is because there's a *trick* embedded in the strategy that I use on all fronts of my working life.

Here's tis...

You need to figure out what you're *good* at and do that, BUT, there are going to be things you're not good at that will still need doing so you need to learn your areas of weakness and figure out how to *manipulate* yourself into the situation where you have no choice but to do what's needed--ideally making that situation as pleasant and oriented to your areas of gifting as possible.

Trick yourself into self-discipline.

Go sailing.

(it builds great 'team togetherness' at the same time)

The more you do it, the more it becomes second nature.

So, go buy a sailboat, and get to that meeting on time kids...

(and send me a picture when you do)

T

Hanging with a legend...

Sir Bobby.

(as shot on the set of UNSCRIPTED, August 2010)

Interviewed him a couple weeks back, for the second time.

First time, back in 2008, was a bit of a rough go. I'll take responsibility for that to some degree. I'll place the responsibility for the rest of it on all the dumb-ass interviews he must've done to that point in his life; interviews that led him to expect my time with him would be more of the same.

I got him to open us a bit back in 2008, but nowhere near as much as this last time.

Here's (I think) why...

I started the interview IN REVERSE.  See, usually, a celebrity guest allows themselves to be interviewed in a kind of 'exchange'.  They give you their time and *some* access into their lives and in exchange you give them a platform to rant about whatever cause it is that they're most passionate about.  Typically, the bigger the celebrity the more likely it is that the only reason they're doing interviews at all is because they're obligated (either contractually, or because their livelihood is on the line) to do it.

Which means, typically, that most celebrity interviews aren't that great.

A BIG part of it, is because (often) the interviewers suck.  Straight up.  Many interviewers on 'mainstream' pop-television are mostly 'pretty faces' who can chat but who lack any real intellectual or spiritual depth. This means that, much of the time, the interview questions are prepared in advance for them by a writer or producer or even piped right into their earpiece from the control room as the interview is happening.

Sure, there are *great* interviewers but you'd know them by name (and could count them on two hands) because their greatness has given them a deserved place on the pop-culture pedestal.

Sad truth is, there are hundreds of interviewers in the World conducting thousands of interviews per week.

And it's making Bobby (as an example) grumpy.

Imagine it from his perspective...

He's spent his life doing what he loves, he's had success, but he's just a human. People are interested in him but he doesn't really want to talk to people about 'him'.  He feels a responsibility to his audience though, feels like they've given him a lot but how much is enough?  How much of himself does he need to keep putting out there until he can call it a day and just live out his life?

Does a 'public person' have a responsibility to their 'public'?

What if it was you?  Would you want to sit under the hot lights and have some inane barbie doll ask you another inane version of the same question 'ken' asked you last week?  How long 'till you'd get sick of it?

So, my job, is to break through those expectations, set them at ease, help them realize that this (moment with me) is 'for real', that I respect them and their life's work and am possessed of a GENUINE interest in what drives them, motivates them, gives them hope, causes them fear and sees them through.

So, with Mr. Barker I started with his causes.  We started with the animals and the activism that's driven him all his life, and because we started there (with passion) I was able to turn the corner with him (and he graciously turned with me) into some of his life lessons and he didn't begrudge it, or resist it or get mad.

The result? A good interview.

Thanks Mr. Barker.

You lived up to your billing.  This kid who grew up watching you left an hour in-person with you liking you more than before.

And that's a rare gift.

T

What to say?

My boy had his first football game on Saturday.

That's him, in red, in his three point stance, at nose-tackle, ready for the first play of his football career.

Pretty neat experience.

Nik and the three other kids and I were on the sideline with a couple hundred other 'football parents' hootin' and hollerin' and carrying on.  Yes, I was the loudest.

It was our first trip into the world of 'normal' suburban parenthood, where you're up early on a weekend, coffee in hand, to go watch your progeny get 'ahead' in life.

At 10 years old.

Later that day, me and the boy went to a Ti-Cats game.

Gotta' admit the flag and anthem ceremony got to me a bit more than usual.  I chalk it up to advancing years and increasing life-pressures.

As I get older and more weighed-down by all that life demands I find myself appreciating my home country more and more.  I found myself, standing there in the sunshine singing, feeling very thankful to be alive, to be doing what I do, to have my wee family to be raising, a fun and friendly wife to be raising them with, in a great twin-city setting in a province with great potential in a country that's one to be admired around the World.

"Rah, rah..." you're thinking, and I get it, but I gotta' say it was a 'real' moment for me.

Today is Monday, post-Sunday, and it was a bit of a rough one at THE WELL for a couple reasons that I can't get into here.  It was our one-year anniversary and I was really hoping for a ballistic week.  Instead we got a tough one.  You get weeks like that in church planting.  It just takes time for the thing to stabilize and for you to get to the point where the ups and downs aren't radical and you've got enough momentum and people-power in the system to keep things humming at a consistent rate.

A church planter friend of mine in Miami had his 2nd anniversary and another friend in Omaha had his 10th. I was thinking of them and missing them a bit.

There are some exciting things looming at THE WELL.  I'll speak more about that in the weeks to come.  The trick is to follow the Lord's lead, with hope, tenacity, courage, thanksgiving and perfect love that casts out fear.

For today, I'm going to go see about a boat for a bit (next season stuff) and enjoy the sun and the breeze and get me a 'terminator' smoothie to try and stave off the cold that has taken last weeks stress as an invitation to lay me low today.

T

Overawed...

I've been a little less-than faithful to this here blog lately.

Yes, me...

The smiley dude on set.

Shooting season two of UNSCRIPTED in Los Angeles CA.

(that's why I've been writing less...)

I gotta' say a few things.

1) It's a great privilege to be able to do it. Many people work very hard to help make it happen and if you're one of them I thank you very sincerely.

2) It's a pretty tough thing to do.  We typically shoot 10 interviews a day, yes ten, and that's about as exhausting as it gets in this biz.  You're thinking, "What, sit on a stool all day and just talk to people? Easy work."  Not so much. The concentration required to give someone everything you've got, all your empathy, all your interest, while conversing with them in a way that 'fits' the show structure, while staying 'out of the way' so your editing team doesn't kill you, while helping the guest feel like we're just 'talking' while doing your darndest to wring something redemptive and (hopefully) life changing out of each interview?  Not easy work.

3) I remain, all these 36 years later, shy of and a bit overawed by the rich and famous. I still don't feel like I 'belong' there. My biz-partner tells me this is a good thing, tells me that if I ever start feeling like I 'deserve' this, that's when I need to really start getting worried.

4) Yes, I'm further along than I was, say seven years ago, filming six episodes a night of a show I wrote, produced, assistant edited, hosted, craft-serviced, and associated guested all in a windowless studio suite in mid-winter Winnipeg (don't ask...) but I still don't feel like I'm where I 'want' (or feel compelled) to be.

Which is why I keep working.

I remember reading that if the 'thing' you're trying to do doesn't overawe or outright scare you, you're not doing the 'right' thing.

Well, I'm good and scared people.

T

In the land of Giants...

Yup, Me and Carl Reiner.

What a guy.  A Hollywood legend with more experience and talent than most people I'll ever meet, and a 64-year old marriage to boot.  Interviewed him yesterday.  I'm shooting 30 interviews in 3 days this week.

Lots of work.  Lots of stress.

I was so horrified yesterday morning it took a real act of will to get myself downstairs to start working.  Once I got the first interview done I started feeling better, started remembering that I can 'do' this, starting feeling like this is a good thing to do, something worthwhile in a small simple way.

I was talking to my business partner and another friend with me (our DP on this shoot) and mentioned that I think, deep down, I--in some way--don't feel 'worthy' to be doing this, to even *be* here. I think I still feel like a little Pentecostal boy from Israel who shouldn't be rubbing shoulders with people like Mr. Reiner.

My biz partner looked at me and said, "Well, if you ever feel like you've got a right to be here, that's the time you need to start getting really worried..."

I think he's right.

It's a very humbling deal being here, doing this.

Gonna' go get my 'interviewer outfit' on and go do my best.

Again.

T

Of dreams and other things...

Took that Friday night at the Toronto Island Marina while my family slept onboard. I'd snuck out to take a shot of the city then saw this scene on my way back and had to stop for a minute to try and capture it.

'Course, you don't feel the breeze I felt or hear the shrouds 'ting, ting, ting'-ing against the masts in the harbor. You can't smell the freshness of the water or feel the path underneath your bare feet.

But hopefully you get the idea.

It was a night to dream about.

I'd done so for most of my life in fact, dreamed of taking my family to a 'far off' harbor to stay the night onboard our own vessel.  Now you, like me, might be inclined to think, "Well, it's just a small boat and just a small trip..." to which I'd be inclined to say, "You're right, but lemme' tell you, the seas and winds and trip felt mighty big in the doing..."

And that might be the point.

The only 'reason' in a dream is found in the 'doing'.

I'm feeling this way right now with THE WELL and my work in showbiz.  I've 'dreamed' of doing the work I'm now doing for many long years, but now that I'm 'here' I find it easy to fixate on how small things are vs how 'big' I'd dreamed they'd be 'someday'.

My boat is 24 feet, I'd dreamed it at 64.  My church (second one) is averaging 62 people (11 months in) throughout the summer, I dream it at 3,000.  My showbiz career consists of writing treatments and workshopping budgets and pitching ideas and shooting (mostly) TV interviews, I'd dreamed it on-set, shooting INCEPTION.

So am I depressed?

Well, sometimes, yes a little.  But then I remember (and I forget again and then remember and then forget and then remember...) that it's in the 'doing' that a dream has reason.

Am I 'doing' what I'm supposed to be 'doing'?  

If the answer is 'yes' then I think the job at that point is to focus on the joy and simple devotion of 'doing' that thing while allowing your 'desire' for the 'dream' to be bigger (in actuality) than it is, to drive you to simple, faithful, workmanlike obedience.

If I didn't sail on a 24 footer I'd never learn enough to sail a 34 footer or a 47 footer.  If I don't write treatment after treatment and budget after budget and faithfully do my best with every single moment I happen to be in a room with a camera I won't have the tools needed to do it when the lights and sets are brighter and bigger.  If I can't work a (sermon) text like a fat kid works a candy apple when only 60 people are in the room I'm going to be in big trouble when there are 600 staring back at me.

Simple.

Do the straightforward (unglamorous) things you need to do today and, with time, you might find yourself doing those same things on a different scale.

'Might'...

Yeah, I said it.

Which leads to the next question.

If it stayed 24/62 would you stay happy?

That's serious fodder for another session.

T